THE NEW ANT MAN

THE NEW ANT MAN


♪ The ants go marching one by one ♪ ♪ Hurrah, hurrah ♪ (Ian) SHUT UP!!! (microwave hums) Dude, what the hell are you doing? You said you were gonna be in your room, cleaning up all your stupid capes. Okay, for the last time, they’re called cloaks and I can’t do that right now because I’m on my snack break. (babyish voice) Little Gordo can’t get
any work done when he’s hungry. Isn’t that right, little Gordo? (microwave beeps) He likes to savor his little snackie snacks. Don’t you, little Gordo? He’s so cute! ♪ (steamy music) ♪ (sexy voice) Ooh, yeah. You know you like that food in yo’ mouth. Ooh, feel it go into your gordo. Ooh, ooh, yeah. Can you just clean your room? Okay, you’re becoming a hoarder like from that TV show
about the people that hoard things… I forget the name of it. You’ve got it so easy, Anthony. No one ever asks you to get rid of your impressive collection of cloaks. That’s cuz I don’t have cloaks, dumb ass. I’m an ant. How the hell are you talking right now? A better question is why did you give me the same name as your best friend? That’s stupid confusing. Uh, no, actually it’s pretty clever. You see, you’re an ant. ANTthony. Heh heh heh. Get it? (wind whistles) No? No. I’ll tell you what, if you give me that snack bite,
I’ll use my ant magic to make you as small as me and you’ll never have to do your chores again. Okay. May-ah-may-you-shrinka! Cool. Nothing happened. Ant magic takes a minute. Now gimmie that f*cking snack bite! Mmm, nah. No, no– argh! (sighs) Well, that’s the third time an ant has let me down in my life. Whoa… (Anthony) Ian? (devious chuckle) (sending text message) HEY! Why are you putting on my cloaks? And, besides, you’re putting on an evening cloak. – (doorbell rings)
– (Ian) It’s in the middle of the day. What are you even thinking? Welcome to my room that is totally my room. My name is totally Ian Hecox and these are totally all my cloaks. Nice try, Anthony! Too bad I have the personalized
certificate of cloak ownership And this is my personalized certificate of cloak ownership in case you have any questions about the legality of all this stuff. See the similarities? I’ll tell you what. I’ll give you $50.00 for all these cloaks. Are you serious? These cloaks are worth at least $50.00. I just said that. Yeah, I know that. That’s… yeah, that’s why you got yourself a deal. No! I can’t let you do this to my cloaks. I’m gonna do everything my power to stop you. After little Gordo gets his snack break. (munching) Oh, yeah! OH YEAH! All right, you’re a dead man, Anthony. But you already killed me. Not you, ANTthony. I was talking about Anthony. Okay, I can see why that’s a little confusing. Yeah. I told you. (death gurgle) Whatever. ♪ (rock music) ♪ (Ian grunts) OH! Oh, sorry, that was really weird. (girl) Are you okay? Oh yeah, I forgot my mom gave me this for when I ride the bus. (Anthony shrieks) Oh! Um… I’m gonna go. (Ian cackles) Hey, Anthony, I guess
you c-ant sell my cloaks anymore. Hah hah hah. Heh– wait, what? (Ian screams) (Ian moans in pain) That ant joke sucks. Ok-Okay, now I’m really dead. (death gurgle) (Anthony) Aight, ant thank you guys
so much for subscribe-ant-ing. Yeah, my pun game is strong. If you guys wanna watch bloopers
from this episode and this… (singing) ..click the video on the left. (Ian) And click the video on the right to check out our newest episode of Every [Blank] Ever. This one is Every Party Ever. Seppuku! – (groaning)
– What the f*ck?! (Ian) And a shout-out to Hot Pockets for feeding my little friend. (babyish voice) You were so hungry, weren’t you? Yes, you were! I-Is it weird that I’m talking to my belly? (Anthony) Yeaaah. And if you guys are watching this on a phone or tablet or on an ant-sized TV, all the links are in the description below.

100 thoughts on “THE NEW ANT MAN”

  1. Vivivivian😝😙
    Wryuuuio😗😌
    Vivivivivian😌☺
    Qetuiiooootyuiioop😌☺
    Vivivivian😌☺😀
    Qertyyuuiiittuuiiioootuiiooo😌
    Vivivivian😒😌

  2. Vivivivian☺😀
    Qtuiopeyip😒😌☺😀😝
    Vivivian😌☺
    Qergyuiiioootuioo😒😌
    Vvian😌☺
    Wryuuuio*yuuiiiykio😒😌☺

  3. Ok but why does Ian remind me so much of paul rudd? They look the same, act the same, the movie is similar to old smosh movies.. Just me?

  4. If you pause at 3:55 you can see the guy hand that it look like he throwing a maniquin that look like anthony falling

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